Wrong
by Tachibana An
Summary: Choutarou knows it's wrong, but he can't help it. Silver Pair.


A.N. First piece of slash I've written, so cons. crit. is more than welcome. Enjoy!

Wrong

Choutarou knows it's wrong, staring at Shishido-san like this. Looking at Shishido-san's eyes when he grins, watching Shishido-san's hands roughly grip his racket, memorizing the way Shishido-san licks his lips in between sentences. Choutarou shivers when Shishido-san does this, and his mouth waters, and he wonders what it would be like to kiss those lips, to bite them, to stroke them with his thumb, and sometimes when this happens Shishido-san smirks, and Choutarou flushes and runs off panting as soon as he can.

Choutarou knows it's wrong, knows he should be looking at girls. They're everywhere, giggling and blushing and pointing at him when they think he's not looking, and Choutarou doesn't really mind them. They're nice. They're not put off by his distant attitude, or his height. They're pretty, even.

But they're not Shishido-san.

* * *

One time Shishido-san's visiting Choutarou's house and they're watching the television when a shonen-ai anime starts. They sit there watching it, Choutarou sprawled out on the couch, Shishido-san scrunched up on the floor in front of the T.V., and Choutarou's hands start to sweat and he wonders why Shishido-san hasn't told him to turn off the girly show when Choutarou's littlest sister walks in, pushing one of Choutarou's old toy trucks and making vrooming noises.

'That's wrong,' she says carefully, looking up at the T.V. where the boys are kissing hungrily. 'Irina-sensei says it's an a-ber-a-tion.'

Choutarou mumbles 'mm' under his breath and looks up at the ceiling and feels his cheeks get hot. Shishido-san doesn't say anything, just scrunches up a bit more, but a minute later when Choutarou looks at him Shishido-san's looking back, his jaw clenched, and the look in his eyes reminds Choutarou of a caged animal, and there's something in his stare that makes Choutarou shiver and lick his lips and realize his throat's gone dry. 'I'm going to get a soda,' he says, and stalks out of the room, and when he looks back Shishido-san's eyes have followed him, and he looks hungry, and Choutarou quickly slides the door shut and leans on it and pants and feels his legs turn mushy.

Shishido-san's gone when Choutarou comes back with his soda, and Choutarou sits and shuts off the T.V. and tries not to wonder what it would be like to have Shishido-san look like that at him again.

* * *

The locker room's finally empty, and Choutarou sits on a bench to put his socks on when the door scrapes open harshly.

'Oshitari-senpai, you left your violin on the-' and Choutarou stops without turning around, because he knows that scent, that smell of cheap soap and sweat and laundry detergent, he's memorized it and it's not Oshitari's.

He turns his head around slowly then stands up, dropping his shoe. 'Shishido…san…' and then he's walking, slowly, and Shishido's still standing with his back against the door, but he's giving Choutarou that look, and it's making Choutarou feel scared and excited and nervous more than anything, and his hands are trembling worse than the first time he played doubles with Shishido-san.

And then he's in front of Shishido-san and he stops, and he knows it's wrong but he just can't help it, and he stretches out his shaking hand and, hesitating, rubs his thumb over Shishido-san's lips, and they're cracked and dry and Choutarou's so nervous and he doesn't know what to do, and then

And then Shishido-san puts his hand on Choutarou's, steadying it, and he presses the back of Choutarou's hand against his lips, and sucks on it, and Choutarou gasps and starts to breath faster. And Shishido-san takes his hand away and looks up at Choutarou, and he looks so hungry Choutarou moves one step closer and the voices in his head are screaming that it's wrong and he takes his hands and puts them on the sides of Shishido-san's head, and then he leans forward. Choutarou's never kissed anyone before, but he is now, and it's strange, and wet, and when Shishido-san tries to put his tongue in Choutarou's mouth Choutarou jumps away in surprise, and they stare at each other, and it's wrong, it's wrong, it's wrong, but then Choutarou's leaning forward again, and suddenly he's pushing Shishido-san up against the lockers and the lockers are squeaking in protest and Choutarou's tearing open Shishido-san's shirt and pulling him down to the floor and leaning over him, panting, and Shishido-san's smirking and unzipping Choutarou's jeans, and-

And even though he knows it's wrong, Choutarou doesn't stop him.


End file.
